Maybe It Just Wasn't Supposed To Be

Have you ever wondered why at times things seem to be flowing and everything just happens to fall into place? There are times when we are on cloud nine and opportunities, windows, events and people come to us that just happen to align with what we want? Everything seems easy and as we watch the events unfold before us, we feel at awe at how it feels like there is someone watching over us. Sometimes we may even question and wonder why it all seems too easy? Is this real? Is this really happening? How long will this last? 

Then just as we start to accept that everything is flowing, everything seems to start crashing down before our eyes. Nothing we want seems to be going our way. Things that were once easy now seem so difficult, the green lights now seem to be red and the flow of energy we once felt is now a cloud of darkness. Have you ever wondered why this could be? Have you ever thought that just maybe, when things are falling apart, it is the universe actually guiding us in the right direction and teaching us lessons along the way so that we can accomplish the things we want?


I think back to a time where I was once dating this guy. For the blog's sake, let's call him Billy. When we first met, we instantly hit it off. I had never felt a connection so strong. Before meeting him, I felt that maybe there was something wrong with me. I couldn't seem to like anyone in a way that was more than friendship. Then Billy came along. On our second date, he nervously told me that he didn't want me to think he was weird but he felt he had known me forever. I had felt the same. It was like we had known each other for years yet it was only our second date.

It was a whirlwind romance. The chemistry was intoxicating, the sex was off the wall and we had fun even if we were just hanging out with nothing but each other's company. We would share our fears, hopes, dreams and desires. Even if we had to work the next day, we would get caught up chatting until the sun came up. I liked him. I liked him a lot and it was also evident that he felt the same way. Things seemed to progress quickly and I had only just come out of a serious relationship. My fears and doubts started to take over and slowly but surely I sub consciously pushed him away.

Looking back, he was a lesson. He was someone that I needed to meet. Billy showed me that not all men were assholes. Not all men were like my exes. I could actually like someone and it was possible to share a special connection with another. Things were going so great that I started to question how real it was. I started to wonder when the 'real him' would come out and I started to wonder when I would start seeing the worst sides of him. I never really did, instead, I built a wall. I was expecting to make the same mistakes as I had in the past and I was expecting him to be like every one else I had dated. My wall was so high, there was no way we could've progressed. 

Billy was a single dad and now he is happily with another single mum. I am happy for them. I am happy he found someone he deserves. I am not surprised that the next girl who dated him, quickly snagged him up and took him off the market. He was a catch. For me though, I wasn't ready for that type of commitment. I still had goals I wanted to achieve and I still had a lot I needed to work on. I was still yet to become the best version of me. If Billy and I had worked out, this blog wouldn't be. "The Fitness Freedom Flow" wouldn't have started and I wouldn't be where I am now. I was meant to meet him but he wasn't to stay. 


Not long ago, I went for a job interview for a part time position at a local gym. I thought it would be a great way to earn some extra money while I also got myself qualified in the fitness industry. To my surprise, I didn't get the role. I had always been hired after an interview? How could this be? 

A month ago, I thought I was going to expand my brand through the fitness niche'. After all, I was getting sent free supplements. I was being paid to promote health products and I had numerous people asking me for services when it came to weight loss. There was money to be made in fitness. I thought for sure, this was the route I was supposed to go, as it was what was helping pay my way. In the last couple of weeks, I had been experiencing a form of growth. I had a mini break down. Even though I had achieved what I had wanted - to quit my full time job - I had realised that what I was doing wasn't feeding my soul.

I went through a stage where I was forced to remember the reason as to why I started blogging in the first place. It wasn't to help people with with weight loss. It wasn't to help people reach their fitness goals. My "why" was to help inspire those that were stuck in places that I once was stuck in. My "why" was to help motivate those that felt there was no other way. My "why" was to encourage people to step out of their comfort zones and outside of the walls our minds confine us in. I felt that from my past experiences, I was able to help others in a way they could relate to. 


Fitness wasn't where i was supposed to be. I was going off track and straying away from my life purpose. I wasn't meant to be a qualified fitness professional. I wanted to do greater things and for a moment, I forgot who I was. I was simply following the money and forgetting where my passion was. I decided to step away from everything and took some time out to re evaluate.

I was working towards something not even knowing what it was anymore. I was aimlessly moving towards no specific goal. I lost sight of where I wanted to be and who I wanted to become. I spent a few weeks in contemplation. I had to be clear on my goals and what I wanted to achieve. 

Once I finally decided what and who I wanted to become, I realised I needed to strengthen my skills in marketing. I needed to learn more about the insights of Google ad words, Facebook algorithms and other forms of social media marketing. I looked into courses and found one that aligned. 

It wasn't long until I realised that I needed to invest more in marketing and expanding my knowledge. I may have quit my full time job but I wasn't in a position to invest thousands of dollars in courses and in marketing. After all, I didn't have the security blanket of a salary anymore. Should I suck it up and get back into the workforce again? If only there was a way where I could learn the skills I needed without having to pay for them. 


The phone rang and I had been asked to come in for an interview. When I looked up the address for my appointment, I realised it was in the building that I had been staring at during my days of contemplation. I would stare at this building and ask the universe for a sign. I had been asking the universe for an answer while staring at this building! I had asked the universe to allow me to learn the skills I needed without me being out of pocket.

The position I had accepted was for a Google partner. I would be able to learn more about the marketing side of Facebook, YouTube, LinkedIn, Google ad words and SEO. The company also built funnels, landing, capture pages and ran marketing campaigns for businesses in Australasia. All the skills I was yet to master and needed for my own development. Did I just hit jackpot? I was going to be paid to learn the things that I wanted to learn! It was a 2 minute walk from where I was staying and completely aligned with my passions. 


Here I was wondering how I had got so lost. Here I was wondering why things weren't working out how I thought I wanted them to. All along the universe was guiding me to where I was supposed to be. It took me to really evaluate myself and decide on exactly what my goals were and where I wanted to be, for the universe to work in my favour. 

So maybe just maybe when one door closes it really is the universe nudging us in another direction. A direction aligned with where we are supposed to go, a direction that allows us to grow as individuals, a direction that will lead us to where we want to be. Have you ever thought that sometimes when things don't work out the way we want, it just wasn't supposed to be?